Finally
making time to write
my letter… hope you enjoy reading…
Sebastian is a teenager with growing taller and
changing voice and all that Peter Brady stuff. He is busy with co-op classes,
robotics club, and karate (he tests for black belt next month!) One of my
favorite memories with him this year is going to see two shows on Broadway. I
took Savy to Wicked awhile back and ever since then – he memorized the Wicked
soundtrack and loved it. I was a bit skeptical on how much he would enjoy a
play. Getting to share in his excitement as he watched the productions
-was
like opening a long, anticipated gift! You know how you hold your breath just a
little and you feel that warm, fuzzy feeling from your head to your toes…
that’s what I felt. When people have asked him what he liked about NYC – he
will say – the Broadway shows. I am excited to go to more shows and share this
with him. My favorite daily, life thing about him this year is that he comes in
most nights, carrying his laptop, and climbs into my bed to watch Netflix with
me. We made our way through all of the Gilmore Girls and a few other sappy
shows. I know that very soon he won’t want to chill watching my chick shows
with me. Silly, simple, but just perfect. He’s my last baby and I think I’m going
to hold onto him a little bit closer than the other two. It’s a little piece of
the good stuff and I’m going to enjoy it as long as I can.
Savy is in her last year of her teens,
graduated high school, and started college full time. The plan is to complete
the Occupational Therapy Assistant degree. She can apply to that program next
fall. My favorite memory with her this year was breaking into a dog park in
NYC! The complete joy that gave her will last with me forever! Who would think
that in a city filled with so much magic – this would be it, but it was
perfect. Well, the dog park and the amazing chocolate cake at some hole in the
wall NYC diner – those are priceless memories with my girl. My very favorite
thing about her this year is seeing her confidence in herself grow! She sometimes
misses how gifted and talented she really is. Little by little, she is starting
to realize that she is capable of many great things. She is seeing that she
doesn’t just have to settle for whatever life hands her and that is a really priceless
to witness as it unfolds. I am happy to say that the struggles we endured last
year have fallen away and the little girl I so very much wanted to grow into my
friend, has done just that. Another very favorite thing with my sweet girl is
texting! I just love our silly texts to each other. It’s like a running dialog
all day long. Sometimes I gotta tell her, “Get outta my head, freak!” because
she tells me exactly what I was already thinking! Love grown up kids!
Tim II aka Timmy – I miss him. It does get
easier and then it doesn’t. I just miss him terribly. When he was about
Sebastian’s age, he asked me if he could make his email address DEMON TIM. I
was like, uhhh… no. So then her persisted and came back and asked if it could
be PYRO TIM. I thought for a bit and decided that I wouldn’t be the worst mom
if I agreed to that. And so – the nickname started. I had actually forgotten about
this story until his friend, Patrick, reminded me. Patrick laughed and said,
“Aren’t you glad you vetoed DEMON TIM because otherwise that might be on his
headstone instead of PYRO TIM!” Oh my, that made me laugh. One of my very
favorite things about Timmy was his humor. He had a way of making me laugh and
as he aged, we could joke about so many silly things. I miss his sarcastic ways
and the way his phone calls would brighten my days. Good thing my other two are
sarcastic and have sick senses of humor as well!
Tim – it has been one crazy year for him. He
injured his back at work last spring. That led to a steroid shot in the spine
that sent him into a seizure minutes later. I know people have seizures all the
time, but I can’t express in words how much it scared me. The side effects from
that seizure and shot were pretty all consuming for months. He is doing better
now, but still dealing with issues on top of his back injury. He will not be
able to go back to mechanic work and that is a very scary thing after nearly 25
years. So, he is navigating what is next. Of course, we have 8 rental
properties to maintain and that is a giant commitment alone. But we are in new
and uncharted territory. I can’t predict what the coming year will bring, but I
do know that we will figure it out. Somehow we always do.
Me – I am a 45 year old perimenopausal crazy
lady. Quite literally, as Sebastian would say. One minute, I am crying. The
next I am laughing. I am a bit loony, but really… aren’t most of us? It’s been
a year of transition for me. Savy is very much on her own and I miss her even
though I know that this is how kids grow up. I missed Timmy when he joined the
army at 19 – it’s a bittersweet age. Sebastian is doing most of his
homeschooling classes with outsourced teachers – some live classes and some
online. So my roll has changed to more of a facilitator in getting his school
done. And – that marriage vow of “in sickness and health” – yeah that has
rocked my world this year. Tim and I have had to dig deep, remember that our
connection is solid, and in many ways learn a whole new path for our
relationship. I read this quote and it really sums it up – “My point is, when you love someone, you
have to do it through the good and the bad. Not just when you’re happy and it’s
easy.”L.Oliver That’s
the whole conundrum right there! Who knew marriage was choosing bedroom décor
with your loving wife and going to one doctor appt after another with your dear
husband? And you know the secret to a happy marriage? A king sized bed that doesn’t
move when the other person is getting in and out! Seriously! We have more
blessings than we could ever need or deserve. It really is all in perspective.
I remind myself that most of the time JOY is a choice. We just have to choose
to see it! I wish you a Merry Christmas and JOY for the New Year and remember
to hug your loved ones!
Lots of Love,
Tim, Kari, Savy, and Sebastian
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